It' five past nine, I've just reached the office and sat down at my desk. I switch on the computer. No-one has said anything about my being late, maybe they're getting used to it, was it them who rang? It's not important anymore, not after the spectacle I made of myself in front of April. Sigh. My inbox is full of work for me to do, information that needs to be processed into the system. I start typing in an effort to clear my head of anything relating to this morning.
*
People are starting to leave, guess it must be five o'clock. A glance at my watch confirms this so I turn off the computer and gather my belongings. Once I'm ready I head straight home. The memories of this morning have resurfaced more vivid than before, I spend the entire journey home reliving the same moment again and again.
Returning home is a great relief, hidden away from the world I can sulk and brood without any disturbances. My flat is modest in size, to say the least. It offers only the essential space required for someone to live in, which doesn't bother me and as it turns out I don't seem to need that much space anyway. Everything is usually kept clean and tidy except for a pile of books next to the sofa and a pile of DVD's near the DVD player.
I put on some music while I prepare a simple meal for myself. Once ready, I take the food with me to the sofa and put on the television. The music is still playing but that's okay, I'm not really watching the television, I don't even notice what programmes on. I just need enough distractions to keep me from my thoughts. After I've eaten I put the plate on the floor and grab the nearest comic book. Most of the time I'm just staring at the pages as my mind wanders between the book, music and whatever programme is on.
Eventually I go to bed but it's not easy getting to sleep. Questions always seem to be more imposing late at night, more demanding for answerers to questions that you haven't yet resolved. Such as, what am I going to do tomorrow morning? Should I proceed directly to work or visit the comic book shop? I'm pretty sure April is going to be there. I wonder what she'll say when I see her. Hmm, I suppose she wouldn't say anything, she's not that cruel. Even so, she'll be thinking it. If I was April what would I think? I don't know, its too late for this sort of thing. I just want to sleep. Everything starts to dissolve into nothingness until April's voice abruptly re-enters my head. "Have you ever.." the words appear over and over again. Have I ever what? Noticed how pretty she is? Yes. Wanted to ask her out? Yes. Thought about what cars will be like in a hundred years time? Well, yes but...Nevermind. This is hopeless, my mind can't cope with this. Fine, tomorrow I'll go back to the shop and ask her if she wants to go to the cinema. If she says no I'll just emigrate to somewhere remote, New Zealand or something. My thought's seem content with this and eventually I drift into a dreamless sleep.